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 Do you ever notice how easy it is to slip into disrespect – via tone of voice, actions, and/or words? We all want respect, but what do we do to earn respect? The Golden Rule is “treat others the way you want to be treated.” However, the selfish mentality is “I’ll treat them with respect when they treat me with respect.” You Want the Respect before you Give them Respect.
Choosing the later causes several problems:
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 Crisis strikes when you least expect it! It is never convenient. It causes a range of intense emotions, including anger, fear, shock, motivation, and worry. Being prepared to respond to a crisis is key to handling the situation effectively. Without proper preparation, you can create more problems, which will exasperate an already stressful situation.   I was at a church service recently, listening to a powerful message by Annie Downs. She asked “what if today is the best God has for you?” The auditorium full of thousands of people went silent.
What IF today is the best it will be for me? What if all the things I hope and dream for are not in the plan, in the cards, or fate for me? I’m waiting, just as I’m sure you are too, for something. If I wait to see if A will happen before I made a choice between B and C, then I am stagnate. I’m in limbo. I’m stuck. Where do symptoms of anxiety and depression come from? From being stagnate… being in limbo… being stuck! Life isn’t about waiting, it is about LIVING! We hope for lots of things, we dream, we wish, and we desire: love, happiness, laughter, money, fame, or fill in the blank with your dream(s). Hope is necessary for motivation and goal setting. However, lack of decision making and forward movement is a sign of depression. Worry and agitation are symptoms of anxiety. Both problems arise when you stop living for today and, instead, wait for the unfulfilled promises of tomorrow. No one knows how their story will end. We don’t even know how today will end. No good comes from fear. A person shows fear when he or she is scared to move their life in one direction because it might prevent them from having other options. What if the original option is the path of success in reaching all your desires? BUT, you hope and pray that waiting on this other path will guide you to your dreams. If a door opens for a change, big or small, then check it out! Make a choice – to try this option or return to the previous option. Don’t stand still.  What is a Life Coach?
A life coach is officially defined as “a person who counsels and encourages clients on matters having to do with careers or personal challenges.” How is Life Coach different from a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC)? Therapists/Counselors assess and diagnosis client symptoms. LPC professionals specialize in counseling clients who are dealing with a variety of mental health diagnoses: mood disorders, personality disorders, anxiety disorders, adjustments disorders, and more. Clients must show symptoms for specific duration and intensity in order to receive a mental health diagnosis. Clients must have a qualifying mental health diagnosis (according to the DSM-V) in order for insurance to pay for treatment. A Life Coach can listen, process, and offer suggestions to your problems without diagnosing the client. Individuals see life coaches when they need assistance in a season of life transition, but their symptoms do not meet the criteria for diagnosis. A life coach may be a LPC or receive alternative training and certification. Who needs a life coach? Everyone could benefit from having a neutral, personal confidant to assist with life changes and challenges. However, 2 specific personality behaviors could readily benefit from Life Coaching. “I Am Who I Choose To Be” said Lois McMaster Bujold.  We are our choices. We can choose to control our choices, actions, and behaviors. The act of choosing to have self-control takes practice and time.
 Did you wake up this morning (or in the middle of the night!) and think, "I need some help?" All you have to do is ask! Contact Bree today to discuss your emotional, personal, and mental health needs. I am happy to offer confidential therapeutic support. View all the counseling services available to you -- in the comfort and convenience of your home. 
 I have passion for my goals, so I prep and plan. I’m smart and educated. I’m a good person. Of course, everything will work out exactly how I always thought it would.
Except, it didn’t!?! I’m confused. And I feel sad, disappointed, frustrated, and sometimes angry. How did this happen? Is it really true that I can’t have what I’ve always wanted? Did I really run out of time to accomplish this goal? Should I have made different choices along the way? Do I have to change my dreams, modify my goals … adjust?? Welcome to reality. It feels like a slap in the face. It hurts me emotionally. It fills my brain with racing thoughts. I repeat my unanswered question “why not?” to no avail. I feel defeated and lost. I want the outcome to be different. I want to know what I did wrong and how I can get back on track to reach my goals. Then, I remember: I am a counselor. I help people work through these same questions. I have 2 options: 1) I can wallow in self-pity or 2) I can accept this disappointment and adjust. Let’s look at my options: We’ve all been in an emotional place where we think “I don’t deserve this” and “I can’t believe this is happening to me!” You’re right – you do deserve to be happy and healthy! So, how do you get out of the dark place and into living your life to its fullest? Remind yourself daily of these 3 concepts: You have the Power to Believe In Yourself Take a deep breath and release slowly Make a list of your positive qualities and strengths Use positive affirmation and positive self-talk You Are Who You Choose To Be Make a list of goals and desires Make plans to accomplish goals that are important to you Replace complaining with action You are Capable of Overcoming Obstacles and Managing Problems Identify the problem Brainstorm for a Solution Make a Pro/Con list Choose a Solution Put the Solution into Action Trust the process Ask for help when needed Life does happen for a reason – choose to be proactive instead of waiting for life to happen to you. Your best may not get you where you want to be, but it will pull you up from where you were. Need help with accomplishing goals and/or problem solving, contact Bree today!
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Bree Winkler, LPC, Ed.SMy goal is to help you use coping skills, change thoughts, and manage behaviors in order to decrease anxiety and depression symptoms. Archives
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